— By: Alexandra Kinias —-
A strong healthy relationship is every woman’s dream and its successful becomes a source of joy in her life. A relationship that is not working can emotionally drain those involved in it. Relations are like investments. We get out of them what we put in them. And as there are some aspects of the relationships we can’t control, yet we have the power to make certain decisions and choices.
How to achieve a healthier relationship
1. Don’t Rush the Relationship:
The acceleration in planning the future of a relationship scares men away. Your man lived a fulfilling life before he met you and because he included you in his life doesn’t mean that he is ready to give up his freedom and to settle down. A romance to succeed requires a lot of patience, hard work and intelligence. A relationship needs to be nourished and to grow organically.
2. Men Belong to Themselves:
Don’t be fooled that because a man says ‘I love you’ it means that you own him. With the understanding that you can’t change anyone, don’t attempt to control your man and to maneuver the relationship towards a direction that he is not emotionally or mentally ready for. By doing so you are giving him the excuse to run away and you will be left in despair, disappointment and depression.
3. Don’t Read too much Between the Lines:
If a man tells you he treasures your friendship, then that’s exactly his intention; a friendship. If you think that there is a coded message in his words or in his silence, which you will be able to decipher if you stick around, you are mistaken. There are absolutely no codes hidden in his unspoken words. Don’t confuse a friendship with a love affair. Be confident that if a man is interested in more than just a friendship, he will convey the message loud and clear. If he doesn’t, just cut the relationship and walk away. If he can’t make up his mind, most probably he won’t. Clinging to uncertainty will just prolong your pain and postpone your humiliation.
4. Intelligence is Sexy:
First impressions are important, and as most books are still judged by the cover, most women are judged by the first impression they make. Yes it is not fair and we can debate it endlessly, but it is the truth, unfortunately. However, in the long term it is your company that a man wants to spend time with not your looks. Beauty fades and looks change. A man’s attraction to your physical appearance may get you so far into a relationship, but it may not guarantee its continuation. His captivation with your intellect would.
5. Strength Attracts:
Be strong, set boundaries and stop being a needy drama queen. Don’t feel sorry for yourself and stop playing the victim role. Strength, self-confidence and high self-esteem have more allure than weakness. Don’t compromise your pride and self-respect. If a relation is not going anywhere then stop trying hard to be make it work or to be a better girlfriend. Just walk away and save yourself the humiliation and embarrassment. The harder you try to salvage a broken relationship, the more the misery and humiliation you encounter.
6. Space – Space – Space
Smothering is hazardous to relationships. It is a sign of insecurity, control and obsessiveness; the basic ingredients for relationships’ repellents. Too much affection is a sign of emotional insecurity just as too little affection. Avoid being emotionally demanding. Men need room to breath. He is not the center of your world so don’t revolve your life around his agenda. As much as men enjoy being cared for and loved, they still enjoy their space.